In life, one has to face a huge assortment of nauseating fads and good advice. There's health and fitness, diet and deportment, and other pointless forms of sacrifice. Conversation? Wit? I am a doubter. Manners, charm? They're no way to impress. So forget the inner me, observe the outer. I am what I wear and how I dress. Oh, now I believe in looking Like my time on earth is cooking Whether polka-dotted, striped, or even checked With some glamour guaranteeing Every fibre of my being Is displayed to quite remarkable effect From your cradle by a true soul To your deathbed, your wrong view Don't ever compromise, except no substitutes I would rather wear a barrel Than conservative apparel Oh, dress has always been my strongest suit I am what I wear I said anytime, anywhere So bring me all my finest, most audacious My divinest, most revealing Most expensive as a boot Most arresting, most heart-stopping Most heart-stopping, most free-flowing Most eye-popping, most arresting Most eye-stopping, yeah Dress has always been my strongest suit