A kiss on the hand may be quite continental, but diamonds are a girl's best friend. A kiss may be grand, but it won't pay the rental on your humble flat, or help you at the auto-mat. Men grow cold as girls grow old, and we all lose our chars in the end. But square cut or pear shape, these rocks don't lose their shape. Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Tiffany's! Cartier! There may come a time when a lass needs a lawyer, but diamonds are a girl's best friend. There may come a time when a hard-boiled employer thinks you're awful nice, but get that ice or else no dice. He's your guy when stocks are high, but beware when they start to descend. It's then that those louses go back to their spouses. Diamonds are a girl's best friend. I've heard of affairs that are strictly platonic, but diamonds are a girl's best friend. And I think affairs that you must keep liasonic are better bets. If little pets get big baguettes, time rolls on and youth is gone, and you can't straighten up when you bend. But stiff back or stiff knees, you stand straight at Tiffany's. Diamonds! Diamonds! I don't mean rhinestones, but diamonds are a girl's best, best friend. www.larryweaver.com