(piano 'Dragnet' intro)

Spoken:

The story's true ladies and gentlemen.
All the names have been changed to
Protect the innocent.
The year 19 hundred and forty.
The city, Chicago. The place, Rubin's Tavern

The story goes something like this:

I walked into a beer tavern
To give a girl a nice time
I had forty-five dollars when I enter
When I left I had one dime

Wasn't she a beer drinkin' woman?
Don't ya know, man don't ya know?
She was a beer-drinkin' woman
And I don't want to see her no more

Now, when I spend down to my last dime
She said, 'Darlin' I know you're not through'
I said, 'Yes, baby doll
And the trophy belongs to you'

Wasn't she a beer drinkin' woman?
Don't you know, man don't you know?
She was a beer-drinkin' woman
And I don't wanna see her no more

Now she'd often say, 'Excuse me a minute
I've got to step around here'
And ev'ry time she came back
She had room for another quart of beer

Wasn't that a beer drinkin' woman?
Don't ya know, man, don't ya know?
She was a beer drinkin' woman
And I don't want to see her no mo'.

~