Scotty doesn't know that Fiona and me
Do it in my van every Sunday.
She tells him she's in church but she doesn't go
Still she's on her knees and Scotty doesn't know!

Oh Scotty doesn't know!
So Don't Tell Scotty!
Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty doesn't know!
So Don't Tell Scotty!

Fiona says she's out shopping,
But she's under me and I'm not stopping...

Because Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty doesn't know! (X3)
So don't tell Scooty!
Scotty doesn't know!

I can't believe he's so trusting,
While I'm right behind you thrusting.
Fiona's got him on the phone,
And she's trying not to moan.
It's a three-way call and he knows nothing!

Scotty doesn't know!(X3)
So don't tell Scotty!
Scotty doesn't know!(X3)

We'll put on a show!
Everyone will go!
Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty doesn't know!

The parking lot?
Why not? It's so cool when you're on top!
His front yard, in the snow
Not that it's hard, cause Scotty doesn't know!

I did her on his birthday...

Scotty doesn't know!(X4)

Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty won't know!
Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty's gotta know!
Gotta tell Scotty!
Gotta tell him myself!
Scotty doesn't know! (X10)


[Chant] Scotty doesn't know! (x7)
[Chant] Scotty's gotta go!