Whenever you're afraid the first person you see is fully responsible for whatever you were afraid of Bitch, where the fuck was you at all that time? I was outside Some shit licked my neck. I'm out here calling you You were here cooking. That's your problem It got to the point where I told my lady I said, you know, I'm not taking out trash. No, I'm not gonna do it She said well, I'm not gonna do it. I said you don't have to it's not a woman's job. It's a man's job I'm gonna make my son do it He's seven years old time for him to start pulling his weight around here he don't do shit That's a beautiful thing about being a dad you can do what you want when you want. Can't nobody say shit about it I woke my son up at 2 in the morning with a complete bullshit story. I kicked his bed. Get your ass up. Yeah That's how you get that goddamn trash out last night First of all, that was a lie. I never said that never said anything like that He woke up he was confused what what no you never said that what calling me a liar You telling me I'm lying get your ass up get that goddamn trash out Private schools are fucking my kids up. My son. He said, all right. All right, all right He goes let me get my flops what Your flops Boy, if you don't get your black white ass down these goddamn steps Get this fucking trash. I'm gonna knock your head loose in here My son goes downstairs he grabs the trash He's about to walk outside. He sees it's real dark. He goes dad. It's real dark outside. Can you come with me? No, no, I cannot No, no, I cannot No, that's not my journey son. This is your journey. It's about you becoming a man. You got to do this by yourself My son grabs the trash. He's literally walking outside. He goes down the driveway I could tell when he got scared cuz he stopped he start doing this shit right here. He started looking around When he looked at me, I said see that's why I'm like doing that shit. Go you all right finish finish He put the trash in the trash can start walking back Out of nowhere. My son takes off running. I mean running haul ass and towards the house running as fast as he can I got scared because I couldn't see What he was running from I? Couldn't see it So I so I closed the door. I closed the door No, I did. I know it's wrong, but I did it. I don't wanna lie. I shut the door. I Told myself depending on what it was was gonna determine if I open up the door not when he got back If it was something crazy, I'm just gonna put my hand on the glass I would say son touch the glass one last time. I hate that had to be this way My biggest fear in life is seeing somebody that I love get attacked by animals I can't beat That's a fear. What do you do? What do you do? You look happy. Are you in love man? What do you do if you see a lady running down the driveway as fast as she can I don't know where Tasmanian devil jump out grab her face from the back You wanna know the answer to that question not a goddamn thing. That's what the fuck you do That's Tasmanian devil. You ain't never seen no shit like that If you look outside all you hear is You're not fucking going out there Are you gonna do is react Oh Oh Get the fuck over her She had enough My lady got mad at me when I said that she got pissed off She got pissed off She said so if I got attacked by animal you wouldn't come out there and help me. I said it depends on the animal If it's a cat, I come out there and kick the cat. I Kick the shit out of the cat But if it's a mountain lion fuck no, I'm not going out there ain't no way in hell She says that you would just let me die If that was God's plan, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna fuck with God's plan Who am I to rewrite what God wrote? That's what God wrote next to your name It said death by mountain lion attack who the fuck am I to rewrite that? I'm be honest with y'all. You know the real reason why we want to help my lady. She got attacked by a mountain lion. I Don't know if I want to be with a woman that survived a mountain lion attack I don't I don't know if I'm gonna feel the same way about you when you come out that attack like What if he got you good? What what if he bit your neck up? Well, if he bit your shoulder off, you ain't got no shoulder no more. That's tough That's tough. I Can't be with no girl that don't have no shoulder. I can't I'm sorry You call me an asshole all you want. I can't be with a girl that can't do this Mm-hmm, if you can't do that If you can't shoulder shrug bitch, I can't be with you You can't show the shrug bitch. Mm-hmm You know how many times you show the shrug in a day? You know how many times you show the shrug? You did a little bit just now a little bit. Look at you Ladies let me tell you something. You don't know how important your shoulders are until you lose one of them Life will change without both shoulders. I promise you that I tell you what you can kiss halter tops. Goodbye. That's over Every shirt you put on gonna look like a goddamn toga outfit all that shit coming across the chest I don't want to be with the toga bitch. I don't want her The girl to look like she won a pageant every day You won every day Oh here come Michelle Here come Miss America, I don't want to be with her