♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ Thank you, ladies and gentlemen You're a marvelous audience Now get the hell out of here I hope this doesn't come as a severe shock But I'm through Drink here, drink lots, but don't eat You know what agitator means? Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Quincy Jones The bright star in the composing business today ♪♪♪ Quincy went down to the barbershop and got his beads blessed yesterday And pressed Ha-ha I couldn't find any ultra-ultra phrases or adjectives I merely say the magnificent Count Basie and his great orchestra ♪♪♪ And I want you to say hello to my piano player who really does nothing I just brought him along to break up the color scheme Mr. Bill Miller He's got a green face, look at this He's got a new kind of sun lamp You get green when you stand in front of it I think you're drinking your own gin, baby That's what I know Whew Remember the words of Joey Lewis who said A friend in need is a pest Ha-ha-ha Dear Abby, get the hell out of here, dear Abby I'd like to just take a second to remind you nice people that there are other nice people who perform in this town And I think they'd like working for you If you're gonna be around drop in and catch a couple of shows You got the big extravaganza, the Tropicana And in their lounge, they got Lombardo and Helen O'Connell And at the Flamingo, they've got young Bobby Darin Young Bobby Darin He's a midget, he's 37,000 years old, I think He's great, he's exciting He really is I'll kill him And in that lounge, they got Sal Cugat and his violin I can never think of that bum's first name It's a very Catholic name And I tried to duck it a long time because that used to be my name I changed it And yeah, he's the guy What's Xavier Cugat? The guy with Abby Lane No, no, she's not there anymore He's gone He changes Indians like Louie Prima does Well, listen, if they want to make a change what's the difference? You know what I mean? Keely was a Navajo Indian, I think And this new chick Louie's got is a Wapahoe She's one of my tribe from Sicily With a bun over here And a knitting needle over here And a gold tooth in a jewel box In our lounge, we have the Righteous Brothers and Betsy Duncan Are those other two cats still out there? Gaylord and Schwartz or something? Gaylord and Taylor Sounds like a whiskey, doesn't it? Gaylord and Taylor And at the Desert Inn tonight is the opening of my personal physician Dr. Philip Harris who makes a potion to straighten you out the next morning that's a gas And this time we'll jump for a couple of weeks while he's around And let me see, further down they've got Hello Dolly and so on and so forth And who's at the Sahara now? No, she closed The King sisters are at the Sahara And the DeCastros are in there The DeCastro sisters We're not too sure about that yet I think they're three FBI guys myself But I'm gonna date them one night We'll find out right away If you hear a loud scream, they're FBI guys Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi Then of course, if you want to hear some real PTA type entertainment you go to hear Belle Barth or Hank Henry They have a fine show And that's it, folks I'd like to leave you with a little thought Say this to you I feel terribly, terribly, deeply sorry for people who do not drink because when you get up in the morning that's as good as you're gonna feel for the rest of the day